Music! Food for the Soul

Dear all,

This afternoon i will be dedicating this entry to music, sent down from heavens above to visit upon us emotions that the artists surely feel, and to make our blessings complete, for what is hearing if we do not hear of music? Ha..yepp..this coming from some1 who can only play the guitar and half baked piano..haha.yess, to those who know me, they know how much i appreciate music, chinese pop, english pop, Jazz, and now christian contemporary music like Delirious and CCC and Reuben Morgan.

But my first ever Idol [figuratively of course] has always been the first boy band i ever bought a cd of, BSB! and within BSB, i've always thought Brian Littrell to be the most cool, talented of the boys. Yepp..and i even chose my english name in honour of him! haha..my name isn't a christian name cos i'm not even baptised yet, but i picked this name because of him, to whom i am dedicating this entry mostly to. You rok!

Haha..to those who know, i've been soaking in the music of his album for the past few days, and as i mentioned before in previous entries, whenever i hear the tracks 'welcome home' and 'over my head' and 'my answer is you' i will pseudo-sing-shout it out wherever i am! haha..and just doing that kinda makes it my own little prayer to God and i am almost always moved to tears as i feel Brian's emotions through the song. Esp 'Wish' where he expresses his heart-felt love for Jesus and his wish to have been there to walk with Him and see him perform miracles in the land. Totally amazing. I tink this album puts him right up there in the charts for christian music in my MP3! haha..

On top of that, he is truly blessed by God! i admit i haven't been following his progress as BSB went into De-funk for a long while, but he has been doing well, going for his heart operation, building a beautiful and heart-warming family and now cutting this album! esp when i've only recently became a christian, i kinda feel like it's qt timely cos any sooner it would not have been appreciated by me, and any later it would lose it's significance to me. So Thank God for this blessing of music that you empower him to bring me these new emotions and love i have for God! Praise the Lord! He is now officially my 'idol', my model upon which i will build my life towards, to have a lovely family, to be writing my own songs and singing them to people who loves me, and to be a Daniel in the world and shining for the Lord! Amen!

Manz, if you're reading in, i just wanna remind you that Christian walk is all about our relationship with God, so do everyth you are guided to do, but make it for God! like even studying you can make it unto the Lord, study for his Glory so that you can shout it out proud when you become the top percentile of your class, that He has been blessing you and guiding you all the time! Bring glory to his name! So when you sing any songs, make it a shout out to God, make the song your own, and imagine/know that He hears you all the time and he is streaming tears even as it starts to gather at the edge of your eyes. He loves you so, what better way than to use music to express your love for him? Remember! everything to His Glory!

With respect to that, to those who know[haha..i seem to like this phrase], Joy and Jon has cut another track! haha..it's called Hosanna, lamb of God and it is a sweet gospel tune. Now that is an example of shining for Christ! Jon, you are the first and only dude who is fantastic with the guitar and cool enough to be cutting tracks with such a beautiful voice, and who is great enough to be sharing it with me even though i haven't been such a good friend and keeping in contact with you! You're truly great! haha..love the track, love you my friend, and love your music! God Bless you with the power to bring down heavenly music to mortal ears, and the heart to make it a gift to people around you! haha..so whoever who read this and catches me on MSN, go ahead and ask me to pass you his track! free-of-charge of course..there's no greater joy to me than to share great music!

Here's to God, thanks for giving us mortals the blessing of music, that we may colour our lives with it and cleanse our soul with heavenly tunes and lyrics, and giving us an avenue through which we may give thanks and show our love for you! Amen!

-Endz- Keep jammin, keep smiling, and keep praising! Amen!

SUNDAY! Church, deliverance, and CABARET!

Dear all,

Yeah! Finally sunday has arrived! haha..like after several days of inactivity or wad feels like that, sunday has arrived! haha..good day..finally get to see lil sis again for after so long [since wednesday only actually..haha..] yepps..but this day is one to look forward to! cos going Esplanade to watch Cabaret! First time going to the Esplanade theatre! ha..like keep walking around the building, cycling around it, shopping through it..even went to watch the performance at the concourse, but never went in to the theatre before..haha..very excited..but i'm getting ahead of myself.

Back to the start of the day..haha..another exciting event..had breakfast at Ya Kun! Yepp..so long neva had a nice cupa coffee and soft boiled eggs and nice kaya toast..yumm..but i tink i mortified Manz when i diced the egg, added soya and pepper, and slurpped it up like a slurping ape! haha..hmmm..is that why you dun eat the egg? haha..yeppz. the coffee was good, but nothing like americano at TCC tho..haha..good enough i suppose..but it was a good breakfast! started my day well!..

Service was gooood..almost regretted not going yesterday evening too..Ps Mike Connell is a fantastic preacher, very engaging and informative[?] haha..i tink it's the first time i ever wrote so much in a service before! heh heh..then we had Ps Kong talking to us from 5AM in Uppsala..a very tired senior pastor talking to us..was very touching..esp when you start to feel everyone's good feelings to him..Thank God for such a fantastic pastor that he has given us! We Miss You! haha..

Yes..Today was talking about deliverance, and evil spirits and all, and what Jesus and how Jesus casted out demons. very interesting, but what was actually qt freaky was that you could even have a demon possessing you and not know anything about it, or that simply having a family background of idolatry will invite spirits into your being. But on the whole for myself, i do not feel any ties or links or identity with any spirits and i most certainly do not believe in them [only the Holy Spirit]..yepp..

On top of that, we had a special ministry session where we had Ps Mike Connell and the church staff and leaders pray for everyone for deliverance. It was powerful, what with so many people's demons manifesting within them so strongly, and so many people slain in the spirit and collapsing on the floor. Me? i went forward to confess my wrongdoings [only me and God knows..haha..sorry..not for blogs..] but amidst praying for me, i guess there was an awkward moment where both me and the leader were waiting for someth to happen. like me manifesting or someth..but i haven even had the chance to experience being slain in the spirit too..and i dun wan to act and i dun think i'm supposed to act too..so if it doesn't come, i'm sorry but i will not manifest then..but it felt comfortable..and that i guess the leader WAS flowing in the spirit when he prayed for me, cos i felt like he spoke some powerful word into me, like the devil likes to bluff us into thinking that we sin when we even think about it, so it's no different from committing it anyway, so we tend to think the act naturally comes after the thought. But God tells me otherwise, that Good is always a decision, and Evil an influence, so i can and should still make the decision to stay Holy even if the evil thoughts came into my head! Anywayz, even if i did not manifest, it felt good to confess my sins to some1 who would prolly never see me again, and to have some1 powerful pray for my forgiveness and breaking the bondage of that sin again..yepp..felt much better now that i like confirm i'm free of that..haha..yes..muz fight to protect my salvation.

Yepp.after the ministry i went home, relac for a while, showered, ate dinner then left home for Cabaret! haha..but one thing i realised was that everyone was home that time! like it was a rare time in the house when no one is out with boyfriend or clubbing or working or playing golf..and i was the only who was running out of the house..and i used to blame my sisters for not keeping the saturday evening dinner dates with the family..and now i am responsible for not keeping family time on sundays because i spend the time with my cell group..wah! now moral/god/family decision time..do i sacrifice time with family for cell group or cell group time with family? but i guess wad with me leaving for studies so soon it makes little difference now? yepp..muz keep in mind in the future..

Then went to esplanade! reach early so i called Jian Hu for his location and the cell group fellowship..and caught them bumming around beside ben & jerries at raffles city downstairs. My first time there! it looked great! haha..totally different from wad i saw last time! it looked fantastic..i almost got lost there and cannot find them! haha..yepps..that;s a foto jian Hu took so he's not there..[sorry man..] yepp..and the next foto is the two sister belle of E266! preetty girls but bad students in guitar..tried teaching them..then Flo keep telling me she forget wad she learn even tho i reminded her to practice so she can tell ppl wad i taught her!!!! and Kat..okay la..kat so much betta..can play song le..but i haven't even started teaching 1 lesson yet! bad student! cannot arrange for time with tutor..haiz..then go learn from some1 else..haha..see Manz? you like my star student le..haha..

Yepp..Cabaret..was fantastic! like at first i was like sickened by the explicit sexual contents that the cast blatently prances around in front of the audience..actually was my fault cos i never checked the contents and the rating and all..felt a bit paiseh cos Manz was only 18++..haha..Ooopz..actually should be old enough le la horr? haha.but i was still sickened..but then i realise that most of those 'ladies' on stage doing those lewd acts and motions were actually guys in cross dressing? so that made it almost comical! In fact i was shocked..cos i was like at 4th floor and suffering from a 'head in my view' problem and din realise that some of the 'ladies' were men! haha..yepp..trust me to notice that.

Yepp, it was a heart warming love story all around, almost like love actually, and very heart warming when you find a old couple finding love again, and a cabaret star falling for a hard-up american novellist, but that was until the interval, then the story went down from there? like the German persecution of the Jews, and the war that ensued that destroyed both the romance between the old couple [poor guy was a german jew..or Jewish German..wadever] and the business at the Cabaret which destroyed the starlet who stayed behind instead of following her heart to be with the novelist. Sort of like a love story gone sour, but it kinda made me feel like if ever i be in a relationship again, i should do what i feel? like follow the heart and things should turn out alright..and this time at Cabaret it turned sour cos they didn't do that..haha..but maybe i'm just slow and never catch the gist of the whole act anyway..haha..

Oh! anyway, it's a myth that tickets for a play at the esplanade theatre cost a lot..haha..i know that the prices like start frm $128. but they went and put the expensive price first! so it goes downhill from there? it was like $128, $118, $98, $88, $78...$28..you get the idea..and basically if you get a cheap ticket, you just try to make sure you get a centre seat, doesn't matter if it's far back, and make sure you poke the dude in front of you if he's leaning forward cos then he'll block your view..otherwise it'll be fine..i dun see the point of getting the mid range tickets..maybe only the VIP seats cos it'll get qt interesting when some of the actors/actresses interact with the front row people! haha.like i tink some lucky dude got a kiss from Emma Yong [the main actress!] haha..i was like..wow!..haha..wished i was that dude for that 3 secs..haha..yepp..Lovely day..

-Endz- Fantastic day, great start, great finish..wad's the link? haha..

Visit to My Cuz

Dear all,

I'm not feeling very well at all describing this visit, but i will go on, just to give everyone out there a better taste/feel of what a blessing it is to be healthy and enjoying life.

Well, to make the long story short, my cuz was juz lying on the bed, hardly able to move about, only able to shift ard and toss on the bed. On top of that, he's really burning up internally, thank God that his temperature has gone down. [it's still at 38.2 tho] anyway, he's sweating even in an air con room. On top of that he's on the drip, and he has not even had solid food for more than 4 days.

I'm not feeling very sad over it, but i'm just not feeling very 100% very hyper and happy about things either. If i seem sad to anyone, pls understand me, but pls dun expect me to be smiling much..haha..but if anyone could put a smile on my face..haha..thank God for you then! but until then..

-Endz- Make me Smilez..pls..hee..

Cell Group Street Soccer!

HarlowZ!!!

Yeppz! Today i hadta drag my tired body outta bed in order to make it to Eunos for street soccer with the guyz from E240 and E266!. Haha..like really rare i join them for soccer cos i had a bad experience from playing soccer in secondary school..haha..yepps..

Wellpz, Remember when i told you guys bout morning rituals? [dun keep to it!] haha..today i really made my day with 2 fried sausaged, and 4 fried chix nuggets, and a sunny side up egg! haha..like really picked-me-up from that lousy wake up where i dragged myself from bed after sub-consciously setting snooze twice already..hah..thank God for all the little favours that He pop into my mind!

Yep..took a long while to reach Eunos..then met ppl like Terence [man, you are really looking sharp nowadays! i look like a nerd beside you lorrz!] and Bernard whom the two of them really look very Yan Dao [handsome] with their contact lenses! man, you guyz should do that more often! hee hee..at least you guyz look betta with contacts wad..i look like a panda cos of my eye bags..sigh..yepps..

Anyway, to most ppl who already know me, i'm hardly a soccer guy; i love basketball, and i love playing basketball..and i tell you..i was a but shocked when they chose to play street soccer in the basketball court when there's a street soccer court beside it complete with a high fence to keep the ball in, and goal posts, and an open door! and the no playing soccer sign in the bball court could not stop them..[living dangerously now..haha] but it's a SACRILEGE! Destroying the original purpose of why things are in the first place..haha..then i took the chance to takle the soccer ball and play bball on the court..haha..take that! Soccer Fans! hahahahah..

Yepps..it was fun..with me running ard not knowing the exact rule, and playing goal keep and confused about not being allowed to use hand..haha..a bit wierd..but it was fun, and it was the first i joined them, so it was great..the weather was good, qt sunny, not too warm, but by 12 we had to cut it cos it was getting warmer and our supply of 100plus ran out..haha..yepps..cool..

Yepp..later gonna go visit my little cuz and trust God in his deliverance, and go shopping for my suitcase..not that i'm making out my little cuz to be insignificant, but if i dwell too much about it, i'll start feeling down, and then i wouldn't be much use to my cuz too right? yepp..so i'll keep smiling, keep praising God, and thanking God for all that we all have received! Amen!

-Endz- Smile always..cos if you dun feel like smiling and dun smile, who will?

DSTA Nite Cycling!

Dear all, here is my entry after keeping you guys anticipating for it..ahha..dun think anyone actually started reading my blog except lil sis Manz but i guess i should address you all who accidentally stumbled over my blog too! haha.. Anyway, Me and Manz arrived early! After having dinner at suntec on the grace of my dear BS teacher Hanzhong, we left for ECP after blessing Sharon with bits of Shilin's XXL chicken fillet [v fantastic!] yepps..haha..reached the ECP macdonalds too early so i bought a Vienna coffee from Mac Cafe [totally cannot fight my americano from TCC or starbucks..haha..] yepps..so i made her do an advert for it..like take a photo beside the drink itself, then we took together with what was left..haha..and this photo turned out qt fun, cos we did not think of coordinating whad we did, and we just bit our lips like that! haha..thank God for a lil sis with the same frequency as i have! So Fun time we had!

Then nite cycling started..pretty much the same as what we did before with DSTA group Suisen, except with more people, and that this time i refused to be the last man and babysit the whole group! haha..not that anyone invited me to..all i did was to ask how many ppl we actually had when we started out..only to find out that we had already lost 3 ppl in the first 5 mins of the adventure! haha..talk about misadventure! haha..then dear lil sis demonstrated how we could shout back and forth, so this time the nite cycling was much much more exciting and interesting than what we did before! haha..at least i din have to message or call anyone while cycling! traffic hazard! haha..

yepps..we headed first to changi Village for the nasi lemak, where on the way the first disaster happened, and Lik Sim's bike had blown it's inner tyre and we could not fix it [no bike shops available ard that's open]. Thank God for cabbies at night and the fact that HaoXiang lived nearby so he could park the spoiled bike at his place in exchange for his own bike and meet us up later..haha..yepps..

Orh! before we left Changi Village we ran into my dear friends Daryl, Huiling [my other lil sis], and Christine! haha..so fun and coincidental lo! haha..guess there really isn't anyth coincidental about God's planning; it was a pleasant surprise! Thank God! haha yepps..so right now i got a chance to introduce my lil sis Huiling! haha..so remember this; i will add another entry about her one day..haha..sorry arr!

Yepps, anywayz, afterwards we cycled on and on and on..all throughout i had my Mp3 die on me, so i was a bit sianz, then Manz oso difficult to keep me company all the time..haha..kinda hoped she would've, but then i muz be independent too ya? *Grinz* haha..yepps..so like had a great time taking photos; i took so much more photos than before, more confident of my camera now, but still din take much scenary photo this time cos i've been to most of the places before le..haha..so wait for the albums to be loaded unto tintedshadows @ DSTA ba..haha..

Yess! we went to have prata at some place near Bedok..haha..dunno where it is still, but it's a great place! anyone from the nite cycling know that place pls drop a comment and tell me the name of the place? haha..was surprised to see the shopkeepers so enthusiastic in pulling business, like open tables and arrange chairs for us even tho like total business was only like 37 bucks for 13 ppl..haha.but the prata was goood! haha..even tho i really shouldn't have eaten so much? i ate like 2 kosong and 1 cheese prata [and manz showcased her sensitive nose by smelling and telling us which was the cheese and egg pratas! haha..i muz remember that..] haha..anyways, if you're reading this, always remember NOT to eat too much during nite cycling? cos i was like bike sick throughout and felt like puking most of the time..sigh..spoiler..then took away most of my energy during the cycle..no wonder my lil sis oso din talk to me much..haa..

But i guess it is super great workout! like while last time was a joy ride, this time we started fast n furious [tho it lasted only 30mins] and we covered great distances, and my thighs like cramped throughout from 2am onwards and we cycled all the way from 1030pm - 0600am! which makes it like 730 hrs! haha..wow..no wonder my thighs cramped lorr..haha..then i was shocked cos i needed to stop and stretch my thighs every now and then, while Manz was like still fresh and everyone could go on..haha..me most fat unfit pig in the world..haha..yepps..and my weight when i checked when i returned is like 54kg..super underweight..arghh..muscles mass lost to fats le..sigh..

A quick summary of wad happened and whad everyone did..haha..as usuall, lawrence was bringing us ard, taking the group and deciding where to go..and Frank was surprising me which his screams that sounds strangely close to a chicken..and DanMan was showing us his altitude vs attitude again with a pose at the old supreme court..Manz and Xiufie were like long lost sisters and bringing life to the adventure by posing several pictures together..Weihong was streaking half naked and babysitting the group as a last man of the cycling group the whole time, and slept at first opportunity anywhere[thankx!]..Weihao was severely self controlled after no one passed down his "Math is Fun" Shoute-outs..Lik Sin was our official photographer so stay tuned to his photographs..and as usual i just tagged along for the fun being part of the crowd! haha..lolz..

AND my zen Micro is playing tricks on me..like sometimes it comes on good, then sometimes it zonked out..but this time, when i was returning home sending Manz back halfway, it kicked in and worked! so i was like listening to 'You're my Answer' and 'Welcome Home' on the bus, and i was like play singing it out loud! haha..and that's the way to praise and worship the Lord! make it personal and from you to God! haha..and while Manz was still asleep i was like tearing a bit and giving thanks to God for everything He has blessed me with, the great fellowship, friendship and the opportunity for me to enjoy yet another night in my life in the world that the Lord My God created! Glory be to God! Amen!

Yepp..i suppose i'm really feeling much better than from when i entered the previous entry; thanks to Manz who so graciously offered to pray for my cuz too..and the fact that i added that entry and prayed for him already, the fact that i have sent my worries unto God and thus need worry about it no more..yepps..and to all of you out there who read and prayed with me, thank you so much..i will update you guyz on how my cuz is doing when i find out..yepps..Manz..i love this Blog! it almost gives me another avenue through which i can direct my thoughts and find God in my life! haha..yepps..thank God for seeing it fit to place in my heart to create this blog! Yepps! All the Glory be to God!

Awright..now time for me to lie a bit before cell group meeting at Hanzhong's place..later will prepare to have a great time in the presence of the Lord! haha..Oww..my bad back....

-Endz- Will be strong for the Lord is for me; who can be against me?

Good events interjected with a bad

Dear all,

I'm starting this entry off with a tinge of sadness, cos i just heard about something that is qt terrible that happened to a family member.

Now i do not claim to have extraordinary connections and friendship with this cousin of mine, but hearing it juz made me shout out to God "WHY!?"

This cuz of mine, whom i'm going to keep annonymous, has a case of HIV. It's not exactly news to me cos we actually found out a year ago. This child had contracted it from his parents and my uncle and aunt who adopted him had failed to make him go through a health checkup when he was adopted or after he was adopted and brought back to Singapore. As we all know, HIV lies dormant unless checked for, and all the while he has been a shy but sporty little chap who was going to grow beyond my height and stature too. He's been healthy most of his life until he was recently diagnosed with it and it has gotten worse over the last few months. 2 weeks or so ago he was just admitted into hospital to receive care for his condition.

But i wonder out loud to God 'God! It's not even his fault! Why does he have to pay for his parent's sins? They should be punished for their own acts of sin and they are the ones who committed crimes against you. Why should your wrath fall upon my cuz? For that matter on my uncle and aunt?! and for that matter on me to know that such a tragedy befalls my family?'

And i feel God just speak back to me in my mind: 'It's no ones fault, but everyone's blessing'

I was confused for a while, but then everyth fell into place.

It's my uncle and aunt's joy to have had a son adopted; he's a son they never had, and i guess at points of time my cuz was the one who kept them together. He's truly a blessing in the sense that i had a cuz i could have fun with when we had a family gathering. He's a blessing in the way that he always was shy greeting every of his seniors, and a blessing when he brought all his games to us to share.

And my uncle and aunt were a blessing to him as well; they adopted him and brought him to Singapore, cared for him, gave him an education, loved him and provided for him a safe environment with more luxuries than he could have asked for before. And sometimes even overpampered him.

And it's up to me to be blessing to him.

Sometimes i wonder, when good things happen to us, we thank God for it and for making it happen. And when bad times happen we blame the devil or worse; blame God. Sometimes somethings are God sent to us, but sometimes bad things do happen too, and we must realise it is God-used. God will sometimes allow bad things happen to us, in a bid that we grow stronger through the fire, and that he may better know us and our hearts. Will we give up and curse his Holy Name? or push through and believe that His ways are higher than ours and that there's a lesson to be learnt in it?

I just suddenly remember a verse [paraphrased of course] 'God is faithful to us even as we are not, and He never lets a temptation/obstacle/difficulty come before us that we cannot handle.' Meaning that He actually QCed all events that are about to happen and he makes sure that we are able to handle it given our faith level and trust in Him at that moment!

Yepp, and i'm gonna visit little cuz [he's only 13 yrs old i tink] in the hospital where he's suffering right now. [i wun even go into the details of suffering] Visiting him on saturday night. So right now i just wanna pray for his recovery in a short passage later, and whoever reads this blog entry, i hope you could maybe repeat the words after me and pray with me and maybe as we lift this prayer up to God he will take this sadness in my heart and disperse it and bring forth a miracle in my life. Thank You all.

'Dear Heavenly Father, Abba father..i just want to thank you for all the blessings that you have given in my life; without your guidance and love i would be no where near where i am right now, and if i'm not where i am right now who would i be? Glory be to you for everything i am and everything i have.

Father, i lift up the broken/weak body of my little cousin into your loving arms. Even as he does not know you or acknowledge your name and power, i pray that your love still surround him through me, his parents and his relatives as we visit him and care for him. I pray that this love will make his life on the earth you created all worthwhile and that he will be able to see and sense your love here on earth, before he meets you in his Promised land of final rest. I believe it'll be a fantastic place on heaven where he may serve you with all his being. But if it's possible, i pray for a healing and a miracle to come upon him here so that he may be a testament to your power and glory.

But not as i will it, but yours be done, your kingdom here on earth as it is in heaven. Lord, i pray that no matter what happens, you fill us with your holy spirit and may it guide us to understand your ways, so that we may continue blessing your name and giving thanks and not curse the situation and let resentment grow in our hearts. Let there be inner healing in my uncle and aunts as they go through this difficult time and let them treasure what love my cousin has brought in their lives and not dwell upon the parting. In your most precious name i pray Lord, Amen.'

Day 2 of eternity..[muz stop this..getting irritating]

Dear subscribers..

THIS is my LIL sis!!! So sad last night when i realise i couldn't put up all the photo i wanted..but then again i woulda over flooded the first entry with too many photos! so now i will only have a photo and talk about it for each day! haha..

Yep..as mentioned before, this is a lovely-lovable sis who so nicely sent a message to wake me up today at 947am. actually not the first time she sent messages like this, but this is the only time she caught me actually still sleeping with reception in my room! RAWRRRRSSSSSS..AAAARRGGH! pain!! muz change my msg tone le..but message tone aside i was pleasantly surprised [thanx to Manz..haha..] yepp..so i tot i would add this in my morning entry to the blog..haha..yepps..

Musing about waking ups..did you guyz know that the 1st 10 mins of your waking up actually sets the tone for tone for your whole day? like if you have someth to look forward to in the morn, meeting some1 you like in the morning for breakfast, or just waking up to ppl's message, or even just jumping out of bed and hopping all the way to the toilet! If you break away from your daily morn routine you could technically change the tone for the whole day! [for better or worse..haha..] yepp..so today i was woken abruptly by lil sis, rolled ard the bed struggling whether to wake or not..but by the time i got to the toilet, i was thanking God for this day that He has given me [and made my sis think of disturbing my rest..GOD?!] and for my lil sis for making my day start with warm feelings that i have a lil sis who loves me! Yepp..Glory to God!

So i guess whad i'm tryin to say is that YOU set the tone for your day! be in charge of your emotions! Even God does not try to change your decisions directly so that tells you that you are in control of yourself! Choose to make yourself a good person [with a good waking up so you be nice to people! haha] choose to do the right stuff, choose to thank God instead of cursing disappointments. Good/righteousness is a CHOICE! Evil is an influence! so me muz always CHOOSE! yeppz..so now i chose to lift my Lil Manz to the whole world of subscribers [numbered at 3 only..haha..] and dedicate this post and morning to her. You happy now? hope you read this so your morning will be as good as mine..later clash with me..haha..yepps..

A little on my day expectation today: gg to have Bible Study with dear Hanzhong and gg to keep dear Sharon company and let her go toilet while i watch her pushcart for her at Suntec..yepps..hope Hanzhong will not be late! hee..yepps, then i will mt dear Manz for dinner, then go down to bedok or ECP to meet Xiufie and the rest for NIGHT CYCLING! hahaa..and NOW i'm gg with knowledge of how to set timer on my camera..haha..dumbz..anyway, i hope that i will be able to find beautiful shots i can post here, and that i will have a great time with my lil sis who will kindly demonstrate how to shout/converse while cycling in a straight file. And of course i will give a quick prayer to God now and have my Abba Father let it be so that Manz will not need to do any administration regarding her uni application today so that she will be there! Amen!

-Endz- Cheerful Alwayz!

Day 1 of forever...

Well, here goes! this is the first time i'm doing a blog, rest assured i will pour my heart into it and give strangers a feel of who i am, and friends an insight of who i really am!..haha..[sinister sniggle] yepps..so get used to my tone and typo errors yah?

juz a quick apology for not doing wad i'm supposed to do as a blogger? [juz in case i'm not..haha] yepps..so now with that out of the way..i wanna intro a few of my friends!

First Pic..my cell group! i am very proud of this picture; it's one of those super steady shots which i hardly manage to get with my shakey hands, and came out with a super sharp photo with good zoom in on all the faces and see whad i catch?! haha..but this cell group is fantastic! E240 Rawks! haha..manz..i hope you guys can see this..haha..love you guyz. you all bring me joy, love, motivation, and good intentions that surely stem forth from God himself! For He uses people around me to reach me! If not for you guyz, i would have still been floundering in self pity and lost and depression and would not even give thanks to God even tho He has blessed me so, and on top of it all He blessed me with you guys! only regrets now is that i cannot do person by person intro to the world..but you guys know how much each of you mean to me wad rite? haha..rawwrssssssss...

Second Pic is a zoom in on Hanzhong's face..haha..sorry HanZhong! anyway, this is hanzhong, the hubby of dear sharon [b dae girl in first pic] and who woulda known he'd do a silly face on that photo!?!? haha..anyway, dear Hanzhong is my Bible Study Teacher to whom i entrust multitudes of musings and questions about dear Heavenly Father above. yepp..so dun disciple me for this post kayZ? Be glad that you are able to bring a smile to friends who sees this photo! haha..

And the 3rd pic is my prize of this year! prolly my lifetime..yepp..the first time some1 actually did such a good job of decorating my journal! wow! like i'm showing it off to everyone who i can show to lorr! She is no other than Manz Ling Lingz!..[illegitimate lil sis whom i adopted and who adopted me] haha..Manz for short..yepps..like totally a great girl who can make people totally comfortable with themselves, who can listen with utmost patience, who can make you feel good about yourself, who is always interested to hear about your musings and your life philosophies. You are a God-sent to me to share my experience and to gain insights from! Thanks and Glory to God for blessing me with this wonderful friend and lovely sister with whom i can share all things Holy and also my more earthly musings.haha..yepps..some1 i can do all things with, like jog with, hang out with, grow fat with, and of course fulfill our secret list of desires together! haha..that doesn't sound right! No..guyz guyz..it's a list of wad we wanna do in Singapore before we go study! haa..then we'll progress to a list of wad we wanna do there in U.S. of A before we return! haha..yepps..i'm gonna talk about you so much on my blog cos i'm so proud of you! so enjoy your airtime on my blog while it lasts! really love Manz for doing something like this for me, except you almost made me tear 2 precious drops for you..haiz..haha..yepps..you are a fantastique lil sis! and this para i just wrote about you cannot do you justice! everyone should get to know who you really are so they'd love you as much as i do! but then i would get less time with you le..haha..[possessive korr appearing..haha]

Yep, so before i go, i muz give thanks to God for bringing music into my life..if i was not given the blessing of hearing then where would i be? yepp..and He brought this song by Brian Littrell into my hearing today. This song i'm gonna feature the lyrics of, and the other v fantastique song called My Answer is you..these 2 songs made me wanna cry for God and worship him so much. yepp..i suppose the lyrics will speak for me. Glory to God! Amen!

Welcome Home (Brian Littrell, Dan Muckala)

When i left home to be who i am / Some people said "no way" / but i laid it all down, gave everything / in my head rang the words that my Father said / "you're never far, i will be where you are and when you come to me, i will open my arms"

"Welcome Home, you / I know you by name / how do you do? / I shine because of you today / so come and sit down and tell me how you are / i know son, it's good just to see your face"

When i look at you holding my heart / i will give to you all that I have / Son, i know there'll be tmes you will feel all alone / i will share with you the words my Father said to me..

-endz- keep smiling alwayz!